Running a Spruce Gum business is serious work.
But we love it.
There is pitch to gather, gum to prepare, orders to package, emails to write, social media to run, advertising, website management, and customers to help through their first unexpected mouthful of shattered tree resin.
But when your job involves turning something from sticky goo into chewing gum, you naturally accumulate a few puns.
Some are clever. Some are kinda stupid. Some should probably have been left alone in the forest.
But we decided it was time to branch out and share them anyway, lol.
As Ariel D. said about the flavour of AmberGoo:
“Very earthy and woody—but we love it!”
That also happens to be a reasonably accurate description of the following jokes.
Here are 30 spruce gum and tree puns to spruce up your day.
1. It’s time to spruce up your chewing routine.
Ordinary gum has had its moment. We are branching out.
2. We be-leaf you’re going to like it.
If not immediately, perhaps once it stops shattering and gets gummy.
3. Chewing spruce gum is a tree-mendous experience!
Emphasis on the word experience.
4. We’re rooting for you.
Especially during your first chew.
5. This gum is unbe-leafably natural.
It comes from a tree. We are not exaggerating that part.
6. Chew can do it!
Warm it slowly, chew gently and believe in yourself.
7. Don’t worry—it will all come together resin-ably soon.
Usually after the dramatic shattering stage.
8. Spruce gum is poplar with people who love the outdoors.
Yes, we know spruce and poplar are different trees. Just let us have this one.
9. This gum has strong family trees.
It mainly comes from black and red spruce, with possible traces of pine and tamarack.
10. We wood never tell you it tastes like ordinary gum.
That would be completely misleading.
11. Spruce yourself before you wreck yourself.
Start with a small piece and chew gently.
12. It’s knot your average gum.
No sugar. No sweetener. No conventional gum base. Just tree pitch.
13. We’re going out on a limb here…
But we think gum from a tree is much more interesting than gum from a factory.
14. Stop pine-ing for a better chew.
It may have been growing in the forest this entire time.
15. If at first you don’t succeed, tree, tree again.
Sometimes the second piece behaves better than the first.
16. We have plenty of resin to love it.
One ingredient is enough when the ingredient is this interesting.
17. Fir real—people actually chew this.
And many of them come back for more.
18. Spruce gum grows on you.
Not literally. Hopefully.
19. Our customers have excellent gum-tree.
Particularly the ones who laugh at that sentence.
20. We’re sticking with the old-fashioned way.
Although real spruce gum is often less sticky than you might expect.
21. This product is rooted in tradition.
Long before colourful sticks of commercial gum appeared, people were chewing natural tree resins.
22. The flavour is nothing to bark at.
Unless you were expecting watermelon.
23. You might call it a forest-course meal.
We wouldn’t—but you might.
24. AmberGoo is where nature meets chew-nology.
Very old chew-nology, to be precise.
25. Leaf your sweet expectations at the door.
Spruce gum is earthy, woody, resinous and sometimes bitter.
26. We’re trying to make a good first im-press-ion.
But our gum may make a stronger impression than we do.
27. Can’t see the forest for the chews?
Take a break and save your piece in your ABC tin.
28. Our gum is a little rough around the hedges.
We know spruce trees do not grow in hedges. We were running out of branches.
29. Chewing AmberGoo is a re-leaf from boring gum.
At the very least, it will give you something to talk about.
30. Thanks for sticking with us.
And just one more...
31. Remember, chews health!
I love that one.
All Jokes Aside…
AmberGoo Spruce Gum really is made from Canadian tree pitch.
It is wild-harvested primarily from black and red spruce trees, with some traces of pine and/or tamarack pitch, and carefully prepared, filtered, hand-cut and packaged here in Alberta.
We add nothing to it. No sugar, sweetener, artificial flavour or conventional plastic gum base. Its flavour is naturally earthy, woody and spruce-like, and its firm texture is unlike ordinary commercial gum.
The first few will be crunchy. But let it warm in one side of your mouth, while chewing and massaging the pieces together. Once it becomes gummy, you will understand why people have enjoyed this traditional forest chew for generations.
It may not be for everyone—and that's okay.
But if you enjoy wild things, old traditions and products that are genuinely different, you may find that spruce gum is right up your tree.
Wink wink.
Chew AmberGoo Canadian Spruce Gum
Thanks for sticking around ;-)
~Amberlin
Co-Founder, AmberGoo (The Blonde Sister)
Customer experiences vary. The quoted review reflects one customer’s personal experience.